officially secretly freaking out

i missed my period.

it used to be that i didnt care much if i missed a period. i was a virgine back then. but now its a different story. i'm actively participating in what merriam defensor santiago calls as the favorite indoor sports by Filipinos. Its not really much of a problem if your married too. But then i'm not so...

right now i'm really, really hoping (praying) i'm not because it would be a tragidy for everyone.

i'm just so nervous right now that i can't even get myself to buy a homekit. it would be my first time to do. but its not my first time to freak out like this though... i want to get this over with.

i told my bf i'd commit suicide if bad comes to worst. which i think is the only choice anyway...